First
there was Godzilla Vs Rodan, then Beethoven vs Chopin, now we have the Satanic
Verses Hollywoodland style. It’s true that Satan never put so many quivering
asses in so many red velvet seats than he did with the Exorcist. And in Hollywood’s
never ending quest to cash in where cash has once upon a time been brought in
before, the suits have done the sequel one better with the invention of the prequel.
As a matter of future trivial pursuit factuality, Dominion: The Prequel to the
Exorcist is the first film to actually use the word “prequel” in it’s
title.
Another
strange fact is that the story behind the prequel is far more interesting than
either of the films that vied for the title. Toward the beginning of the 21st
century celebrated filmmaker Paul Schrader wrote and subsequently directed the
original prequel to the Exorcist (now titled Dominion - short for Dumb Opinion)
a sober and contemplative morality tale that eschewed creepy special effects in
favor of cerebral rumination. The film scared the hell out of it’s producers,
due entirely to the fact that it wasn’t scary enough to merit an R rating
and thus it was shelved (one would hope in some fractured and gothic catacomb)
and another director, Renny Harlin, whose horror directing track record boasted
only the fourth Nightmare on Elm Street sequel, was charged with the mandate of
taking the original footage and most of the original cast and scarying it up.
His
take on perhaps the most influential horror franchise in history was entitled
Exorcist: the Beginning. It was an embarrassing shlock-fest, reviled by critics
the world over and universally ignored at the box office. A cut and paste waste
of time, that featured a special effects blow-out for a finale that by all rights
you should find in the comedy section of your local video store. Which is not
to suggest that the original Schrader version is some sort of lost classic. On
the contrary - it’s as though the two film makers were trying to outdo each
others ineptitude. Both films (I’m amazed Harlin left them in) feature perhaps
the most ridiculous looking CGI creations in a film with a budget that exceeds
2 million dollars. On three everybody - the hyenas. Now I get why they’ve
always been referred to as laughing hyenas, because never has a faux critter looked
so completely unrealistic and laughable. In Harlin’s version they serve the
purpose of tearing a family limb from limb, Schrader, on the other hand, used
them strictly for laughs.
The
two chief plot points of the films remain - one almost untouched and the other
given short shrift. In the prequel Father Merrin (Skellan Skarsgard) is not a
father but an archeologist with agnostic leanings. This all stems back to a life-changing
incident during the second world war, where a Nazi commander of some kind forces
Merrin to pick 10 random and innocent peasants to be gunned down execution style.
To refuse the command would mean the slaughter of all of the peasants as well
as Merrin himself. We flash forward to mid fifties and Merrin is called to supervise
the excavation of a rather odd Byzantine church. The church is most unusual because
it was buried not long after it’s construction. In Harlin’s version
much was made of this and it’s grand opening was quite suspenseful, as it
became more and more clear that this was a church built to worship Satan. Strangely
in Schrader’s version much of this drama was sidestepped, and the church
was breached by a couple of greedy soldiers - in search of fortune. In this respect
Harlin’s film was far superior.
It’s
clear that Harlin was commissioned to step up the creepy factor and up until the
hyenas his version was passably scary. It’s a shame you couldn’t take
the last 15 minutes of Harlin’s version and replace it with the last fifteen
minutes of Schraders’s version. That’s the best chance you’d have
at a marginally scary film that's not a laughable embarrassment to the franchise.
The possessed individual remains the same in both films - a native African named
Cheche (who looked spooky enough before the demons came calling. in Harlin’s
version he became gruesome and telekinetic - in Schrader’s version he looked
the same, he just became more physically imposing - more of a steroidal possession.
Earlier I mentioned Harlin’s completely absurd ending, featuring a special
effects show down between the demon nurse and recently spiritual Merrin. It’s
this unfortunate choice that made Harlin’s version impossible to get behind,
but for all it’s over-the-top Poltergeist-thieving ineptitude, at least it
tried to scare you. Whereas Schrader simply attempts to bore the audience out
of their seats with a climax that featured a bald and androgynous demon, similar
to the one Mel Gibson used in Passion of the Christ. He was about as menacing
as Telly Savalas with eye-shadow. Goodness if this is what passes for an intellectual
morality play, I’ll take the hokey Poltergiest nurse twice on Sunday.
Most
critics have deemed Schrader’s version a psychological and moral study, and
some have even lauded it’s restraint. I’ll be the first to tell you,
however, that’s no different than calling dog shit, fudge. Harlin’s
version while equally lame for different reasons, at the very least attempted
to be scary and carry on the tradition of the franchise. As far as I'm concerned,
in this epic struggle between limp and tepid and schlocky and laughable it’s
pretty much a tie for last. If you're looking for an effective possession film,
either rent Constantine or wait for Emily Rose to come out on video.
