Say whatever you want about Jason Statham, but at the end of the day, you know exactly what you are going to get in Stath flick. Action, arse kicking, a couple of lovely dolly birds, his short right off and some kick-ass one liners. To celebrate the release of his new film Spy, which arrives in cinemas on Friday 5th June, we thought we’d count down our favourite Stath moments that have been captured on film over the years since his debut in 1998’s Lock Stock & Two Smokin’ Barrels. We love him. We all love him.
“Protection from what? Ze Germans?” SNATCH (2000)
Stath plays… Turkish
Shirt On, or Shirt Off? – Shirt On
Possibly the film that secured Stath as a Hollywood leading man. His turn as Turkish is perhaps my favourite role that Statham has portrayed on screen. The film is full of one liners and fun interactions, particularly with Brick Top (Alan Ford) and Tommy, played be the equally legendary Stephen Graham, who features here. I think it’s Jase holding that milk bottle that sets the whole scene off.
“Oil Slick Fight Scene” – The Transporter (2002)
Stath plays… Frank Martin Shirt On, or Shirt Off? – Shirt Off Two years after the success of Snatch, Statham secured his first proper Hollywood actioner in the for of The Transporter from director Louis Letterier, which would evolve into his first trilogy of films; three films which would see the larger than life Englishman take his shirt off and kick some arse. A lot. This is my favourite scene from the climax of the movie. Take a look at Jase in a bought of fisticuffs in a bloody oil slick! Shuffle to about five minutes in… Brilliant.
“Striptease!” – TRANSPORTER 3 (2008)
Stath plays… Frank Martin Shirt On, or Shirt Off? – Shirt Right Off
The Stath is made to strip by an Eastern European lady in the third film in the franchise… Cor blimey guvnor! Has he been working out? Apologies, but You Tube won’t allow this video to be embedded, but if you click through you can check it out in full…
“Do you think I’ve got c**t written on my forehead?” – CRANK (2006)
Stath plays… Chev Chelios Shirt On, or Shirt Off? – Shirt On
A simple line, 100% Statham, from a bloody awesome movie that I could watch over and over again! One of many moments from a very quotable film, but this particular one captures the essence of what this muscleman is all about. Check it out about 1:57 into this scene…
“The Monk attacks!” – MEAN MACHINE (2001)
Stath plays… The Monk Shirt On, or Shirt Off? – Shirt On
A little known Statham movie this, and one that reunited the Lock Stock boys in a British remake of the Burt Reynolds film The Longest Yard (before the wanky Adam Sandler remake). Statham plays the quiet, but incredibly violent Monk, an inmate who is positioned in the role of goal keeper on the prisoner’s football, or indeed soccer team. I think I like this for Stath’s slick-back hairdo…
“Airport Man” – COLLATERAL (2003)
Stath plays… Airport Man Shirt On, or Shirt Off? – Shirt On Yep. He was [briefly] in Collateral. Didn’t know that did you? That’s why I included it… “I’m fine mate. Don’t worry about it… Enjoy LA.” His total amount of dialogue in the whole film. Still nailed it though.
“Chinatown Sex Scene” – CRANK (2006)
Stath plays… Chev Chelios Shirt On, or Shirt Off? – Shirt On, Pants Off Crank gets in there again with this a definite highlight of the movie, and very unexpected indeed. You see, the point of the film is that Statham must keep his heart rate up, and throughout uses various tricks to do so… including bending one up Amy Smart in the middle of LA’s Chinatown. Filth.
“Plane” – THE EXPENDABLES (2010)
Stath plays… Lee Christmas Shirt On, or Shirt Off? – Shirt On Jason Statham, Sylvester Stallone. Stallone is piloting a plane and Statham is positioned in a seat in the nose, head and shoulders poking out shooting at the bad guys. Just brilliant. Again.
“Opening Scene” – LOCK STOCK AND TWO SMOKING BARRELS (1998)
Stath plays… Bacon Shirt On, or Shirt Off? – Shirt On
Perhaps Statham delivering his best snipet of dialogue… ever: “Right. Let’s sort the buyers from the spyers, the needy from the greedy, and those who trust me from the ones who don’t, because if you can’t see value here today, you’re not up here shopping. You’re up here shoplifting. You see these goods? Never seen daylight, moonlight, Israelite. Fanny by the gaslight. Take a bag, c’mon take a bag. I took a bag home last night. Cost me a lot more than ten pound, I can tell you. Anyone like jewelry? Look at that one there. Handmade in Italy, hand-stolen in Stepney. It’s as long as my arm. I wish it was as long as something else. Don’t think because these boxes are sealed up, they’re empty. The only man who sells empty boxes is the undertaker, and by the look of some of you lot today, I’d make more money with me measuring tape. Here, one price. Ten pound.”
“You got some balls Luke…”
The Statham as Luke: “Yeah, I’m suprised I can even walk.” – Safe (2012)
Spy opens on Friday 5th June, 2015
