Stretch Armstrong Gets A Breck Of A Director!

The rumoured movie of the toy STRECH ARMSTRONG has been doing the rounds in Hollywood for a quite a while now, with the yawn-some Taylor Lautner previously attached. However, part of that is to become a reality as Breck Eisner has been confirmed as the man to bring him to the big-screen. Whether Launter will still feature remains to be seen. Would his acting abilities really stretch that far? After enduring his first lead with ABDUCTION, I think he’d struggle to use the toilet on his own.

Eisner meanwhile had this to say on his announcement:

This is a fantastic opportunity to create a world that is both fresh and exhilarating. What really excites me is the chance to build a hero from the ground up.

The director has patchy resume at best. He was in charge for Matthew McConaughey’s expensive disaster SAHARA but did oversee the terrific remake of George Romero’s horror classic, THE CRAZIES. The plot for the Stretch Armstrong film – based on Hasbro’s heroic action figure-turned dog toy – will hopefully see him doing more than sitting on his arse and reaching into the next room for the remote control (to see if ABDUCTION’s on the box, presumably). Better still, hide him behind the bloody sofa for 90 minutes. Dean Georgaris is on script duties. THN can hear him curling one out on the page right now as he checks his bank to see if his payment has cleared. It’s slated for cinemas 11th April 2014.

Source: Relativity Media

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Craig was our great north east correspondent, proving that it’s so ‘grim up north’ that losing yourself in a world of film is a foregone prerequisite. He has been studying the best (and often worst) of both classic and modern cinema at the University of Life for as long as he can remember. Craig’s favorite films include THE SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION, JFK, GOODFELLAS, SCARFACE, and most of John Carpenter’s early work, particularly THE THING and HALLOWEEN.

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